Only in my dreams

Talking about sex in pulic forum, like this blog inspires alot of sexual discussion,and even sometimes arguments and insecurity. It's not always easy to discuss sex,and the things that you like and don't like,and why. Between the reading what other people have to say, and writing our own blog, I feel like I am slowly upping my comfort level.

It has always been a point in my mind how different my sexual fantasies,and my sexual realities are. I often have the slave-to-multiple men fantasy,or play the role of the submissive maid,when most of the time in bed the only thing I need is to have him say how sexy I am,and how much he wants me. Sometimes my fantasies touch deeper to rape or violence,in the "real world" things I cannot condone. I get sort of embarassed if he asks what I am thinking about,and I don't want to admit what's really in my head.

I am sure there are lots of reasons for my fantasies of control,but I can't imagine myself ever letting those things happen,it's so very hard for me to give over control of myself in any fashion. I trust my husband implicitly so allowing him control is getting easier...for now the rest will have to stay in my dreams.